How To Get Out Of Your Dating Rut
Are you stuck in a bit of a dating rut? I’ve been there. You’re frequenting the same old dating apps, meeting the same kind of people over and over again, and you’re turning up to the same bars and restaurants, week after week, in the hope of finding your other half.
At first, it’s new and exciting and full of possibility. After a while, it starts to feel stale and boring. You’re going through the motions, and frustratingly, it’s not leading to anything meaningful or even promising.
What you really need to do right now is get yourself firmly out of that dating rut, by shaking things up a little bit. Here’s how to do it…
Try a new method of meeting people
We’re very much creatures of habit. We tend to have the same breakfast every weekday, take the same route to work, and spend our weekends binge watching the same genre of shows on Netflix. I love having a good routine, and familiarity isn’t a bad thing. Until it is, because it isn’t working for you. If you’ve been on Tinder for six months now and you’re seeing the same old faces time and time again, it’s probably wise to think about widening your net.
Join a new dating app. Make it your mission to strike up a conversation with that man who catches your eye on the commute. Go old school, and check out speed dating events in your local area. I love this piece from Metro on the joys and the horrors of speed dating. They sat that a change is as good as a rest, and it could be just what you need to get out of your dating rut.
Suggest a totally different kind of date
You meet at a local bar that ticks all your boxes. You have a few drinks together. If things are going well, you might grab a bite to eat in the restaurant round the corner. How many times have you essentially been on exactly the same date, with a different man?
Getting a little out of your comfort zone could be an ideal way to shake things up a little, and kickstart a different kind of conversation. At this time of year, ice skating or a Christmas market could be a great idea. Or if you’re feeling bold, why not suggest a karaoke bar? You don’t have to be a good singer. In fact, being a good singer is almost against the rules.
Take a break for a while
Dating can feel a bit relentless at times. You dress up three times a week, you plan some witty conversation, and every night seems to blend into all the others that came before it. Listen, I’m a bit advocate of getting out there and making things happen. But if you know you’re in a dating rut, it might be time to just take a break completely.
Spend some time with your friends, or getting stuck into a DIY project, or taking up a new hobby. A couple of months out of the dating game could be just what you need to reconnect with yourself and think about what you really want. The apps will still be waiting of you, and as much as I hate to share an annoying cliche, you might find that love comes looking for you when you least expect it.
Have you been dating for a while? How do you keep things interesting and exciting when you just aren’t meeting the right people?